The of the Kingdom of Heaven Perception of Life | The Word of God Leads Me to Live Out the Likeness of Man
December 19, 2017
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| The Picture of The Church of Almighty God |
After returning to the dormitory, I felt particularly bad and really wanted to see brothers and sisters. I recalled the days of being with brothers and sisters. No matter what I did wrong, they would not laugh at me or belittle me but would give me the fellowship of God’s words, support me and help me get out of difficulties. But now I could not contact brothers and sisters, I felt so lost. At that moment, I remembered a movie I had seen, The Best of Youth. It described the experiences of a sister of The Church of Almighty God, who was pampered and lived in comfort since childhood. Sometimes her parents would say something she didn’t like and she would become angry and not eat. Later she believed in God. One time, whilst doing her duty, because she had to ride a bike very far and felt that this was very hard and she was very tired, she made a lot of complaints. When brothers and sisters communicated the truth to her and helped her, she could not accept it either and was still very arrogant and at loggerheads. Thinking of the similarities between my experience and hers, I really wanted to see how she had changed. After turning the video on, I saw the word of God and sister’s understanding: “‘God’s dealing of people’s external disposition is also one part of His work; dealing with people’s external, abnormal humanity, for example, or their lifestyle and habits, their ways and customs…’ (‘Only Loving God Is Truly Believing in God’ in The Word Appears in the Flesh). ‘No matter what your actual stature is, you must first possess the will to suffer hardship as well as true faith, and you must have the will to forsake the flesh. … God will perfect you through these things. If you lack these conditions, you cannot be perfected’ (‘Those Who Are to Be Made Perfect Must Undergo Refinement’ in The Word Appears in the Flesh). I understood God’s intention from His words. After being corrupted by Satan, I had no humanity and had become particularly fond of comfort of the flesh and afraid of hardship. I did not even have the ability to take care of myself. So God put me in this environment, to temper my will, strengthen my perseverance and reinforce my shortcomings…. So I stopped to reflect upon myself and saw that in the word of God it says: ‘What is the transformation of disposition? You must be a lover of truth, accept the judgment and chastisement of God’s word as you experience His work, and experience all kinds of suffering and refining, through which you are purified of the satanic poisons within you. This is the transformation in disposition’ (“How to Know Man’s Nature” in Records of Christ’s Talks). Through the judgment of the word of God, I understood that I wasn’t someone who accepted the truth. Sister’s dealing sprung up from God. It was to help me change. To love the truth, one must accept the truth. God uses all kinds of trials and refinement to cleanse the toxins within me and my life disposition can only change in this way. When I think back to the corruption I have revealed, I realize that it is satanic toxins, thinking ‘Only I myself am honorable’ inside me that are causing trouble, resulting in me not being able to get on harmoniously with brothers and sisters. I always want to have the final say and always want to make people listen to me, but this is the wrong standpoint. It is as if I were the boss. I lose my temper at the slightest thing that doesn’t please me. This is my satanic disposition being revealed. It also hurts other people.” Having read God’s words and the understanding of this sister, I saw that I am also someone who cannot endure hardship, who does not persevere with work and is extremely conceited. Faced with difficulties at work, I do not try to find ways to resolve them, endure hardship and pay the price to strive to do it well. On the contrary, I long for God to show a miracle and enable me to do everything. I do not want to suffer and pay the price because I am afraid of hardship and tiredness. Thinking more, not only do I not have the will to suffer, but I even do not allow others to point out my problems and after I have been taught a lesson, I want to flee that environment; I am both conceited and very weak. From God’s words I have understood that everything God does to me is to change my corrupt disposition and let me cast aside my arrogant, lazy, vulnerable disposition, humble myself and make me into a person who does things diligently, responsibly and with perseverance. After understanding God’s will, I prayed to God and asked Him to give me the will to endure suffering. That evening my classmates who came with me came to help and comfort me and told me what the trick was to do things. When I worked hard, I found I learned a lot. Once I took an old Japanese couple to their seats and they knew I was still studying and encouraged me saying: “頑張ってね (Keep at it!)” It warmed my heart to hear this and tears came to my eyes. I understood that this was God moving people to encourage me and in that moment, I felt that God was by my side, watching me grow little by little.
Several days later, my senior checked to see whether my seating of people was up to standard. I thought that I would definitely be up to standard with my fluent Japanese and long-ago learnt phrases for seating people. But I did not do well on some details and my senior said that I did not make the grade in any way. I really wanted to vent my dissatisfaction, but I was still labelled as unqualified so I did not dare vent my anger. Very soon, it was time for the second inspection. This time, I did not make any mistakes when seating people, but when I asked my senior for the result, she said, “Wait until the customer orders a drink; if you do not make a mistake, then you qualify.” When I heard her say that she would test my taking the ordering of drinks, I suddenly panicked because I only knew the name of one drink and for other drinks, not only did I not know their names, but I did not know where to take them. I thought to myself: “It’s over. I would not make the grade again.” As a matter of course, in the evening there was a table of 12 customers who ordered 12 kinds of drinks. I had not even finished writing down one when the next customer ordered his. My senior was staring to my side and in the rush, I got quite a scare. Finally, they finished placing the order and on the way to get the drinks with my senior, she said: “Not only did you miss a class of fruit juice but you also forgot to ask whether they wanted water or ice with their whiskey! What are you panicking for with there being more people?!” At that time I did not have any reason to refute, but felt very angry and aggrieved: This is my first time taking drinks orders; being able to do this was already pretty good, so why find fault! Later, she told the supervisor again that I wasn’t good enough and the supervisor had no choice but to continue to ask someone to show me.
—This article from The Church of Almaighty God, The Gospel of the Kingdom of Heaven
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